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"You are old. Father William." the young man said,
"And your hair has become very white;
And yet you incessantly stand on your head
Do you think, at your age, it is right?"
It's anything but a breeze to grasp the
Capricorn character. You'll learn to recognize this Sun
sign, but you'll need some preliminary practice. Study
the quiet spider in the comer. He hasn't a chance
against the fast-flying insects. But they get caught in
his cleverly spun web-and the spider wins. Remember
Aesop's slow tortoise, humorously crawling in that race.
He hasn't a chance against the quick, bright hare. But
the flighty hare goes in all directions, forgetting the
goal-the tortoise wins. Observe the goat, as he scales
the mountainside. He hasn't a chance against the
strategy of the smarter humans who pursue him. But the
hunters fall behind as the sturdy goat climbs
determinedly from crag to crag on his uniquely designed
hooves-and the goat wins.
Now study a Capricorn. Where will you find him? Just
about anywhere he can advance or improve himself.
Anywhere he can get ahead and further his secret
ambitions. Try a social gathering. The Capricorn is not
a carefree party type, but the goat we're studying is a
social climber as well as a mountain climber. Pick a
mixed group, preferably in the upper income level. You
can also try the middle income level, but the lower you
go beneath that, the smaller your chances of finding a
Capricorn. He probably won't be wearing a lamp shade on
his head, tap dancing or calling attention to himself in
any way; he'll be the admiring spectator in the
background. You may not even notice him at first as he
quietly and calmly watches all the flashy, pushy,
charming, aggressive and brilliant personalities around
him. Everyone in the group will seem to have superior
equipment for the race-any race. Lots of them are
bluffing, some of them are afraid, but they're all
highly polished, and the Capricorn doesn't seem to have
a chance against them. Yet, he will win.
A couple of years ago, I visited the bookstore of a
New York astrologer. As I carelessly scattered my gems
of wisdom, gave him unsolicited advice about what books
he should stock, and argued astrological theory with
him, I learned he was a Capricorn and he learned I was
an Aries. Smugly, I guessed his correct ascendant,
talked faster, moved faster and seemed to dominate the
scene. Before I left, he gave me a charming, gentle
smile, and in a fascinating Hungarian accent, he said a
funny thing. He said, "Capricorn will always triumph
over Aries. The goat will win over the ram." It was
spoken lightly, but he was quite serious. Outside the
bookstore, I laughed to myself. "Imagine such conceit,"
I thought. "No one can top a double Aries." Know what?
When I can't find certain books I need that have been
out of print since Noah built the ark, the Capricorn
comes up with them. Gradually, I've been forced to pay
respectful tribute to his superiority. Now here I am
crediting his Sun sign with qualities I envy, but don't
possess. You see? Capricorn won.
Another confession. As an Aries, I hate to take
direction. No Aries writer can stand to have anyone edit
his work. Recently, it was suggested that a Capricorn
woman go over some material I had written. I was
infuriated. Outwardly I agreed, but secretly I decided
that she wasn't going to change a single word of the
product of my genius. I would only pretend to go along.
She made her suggestions quietly, almost timidly, and
against my will I saw only too clearly how intelligent
they were. Why hadn't I thought of cutting that phrase
and changing that word myself? After I had grudgingly
followed her instructions to the letter, the improvement
in the material was painfully obvious. Capricorn won
again.
I've finally made up my aggressive Aries mind that
it's no use to fight them. You might as well do the same
thing. Pity the high pressure salesman who sizes up his
Capricorn pigeon and thinks, "This guy is a pushover. I
can sell him the Brooklyn Bridge." He has a lot to
learn.
Since the goat merges into the group so gently,
unconsciously camouflaging himself into the background,
it's not always easy to recognize the physical
characteristics of this Sun sign. Capricorns can be
stocky and muscular, thin and wiry or plump and soft.
But no matter how the body is shaped, the goat will give
the impression of being rooted to the spot, until he
decides to move to another spot. Generally, Saturn
people have straight, lank, dark hair, dark, steady
eyes, and swarthy olive or tan complexions. You'll see
Capricorns with curly blonde hair and blue eyes, but
watch them closely. Honestly now, don't they really look
as if they should have been born with dark hair, eyes
and skin? It's a delicate point, but valid. Take Marlene
Dietrich, for example. Dresden china complexion, green
eyes and corn silk hair. Look again. Observe her calm,
deliberate actions. Listen to her deep, throaty voice.
Note her legendary tough business head and her earthy
ambition. Aren't these more synonymous with the steady,
reliable image of a brunette? Master this subtlety and
you'll never be fooled by the appearance of a Capricorn.
There's always a faint aura of melancholy and
seriousness surrounding the Saturn personality. None of
them completely escape the Saturnine influence of stem
discipline and self-denial. Many Capricorns have strong
feet and wear sensible shoes. Their hands are capable,
their voices usually even and soothing-and you'll
probably notice a gentleness that flatters and
persuades. Capricorns can look and act as harmless as a
feather quilt, but they're as tough as a keg of nails.
They hammer away persistently, relentlessly, managing
to digest insults, pressures, disappointments and duty
as calmly as the goat digests rusty cans, broken glass
and cardboard. Like him, they have iron stomachs and
dangerous horns. While the gay, laughing extroverts
scatter their energies hither and yon, Capricorns never
deviate an inch to the left or right. They steadily
follow the upward path, with inbred faith in the
security of the well-traveled road, and contempt for the
enticing short cuts they know are full of pitfalls.
Capricorns have an enormous admiration for those who
have preceded them to the top of the mountain, and who
have laid down the laws for the journey. They court
success; they respect authority and honor tradition.
Lots of energetic, impulsive people label them snobbish
and stuffy. The goat could conversely label his critics
rash and foolish, but usually he's too wise to make
unnecessary enemies by indulging in such self-defense.
The Saturn-ruled submit. They agree. They adapt. Or do
they just appear to do so? Capricorn allows others to
walk in front of him, but he often gets there first,
against all logic. He's careful to avoid the obstacles,
the sharp rocks. No wonder he seldom stumbles. His eyes
aren't fastened on the stars. He keeps his gaze fastened
ahead, and his feet firmly planted on the ground.
Jealousy, passion, impulse, anger, frivolity, waste,
laziness, carelessness-are all obstacles. Let others
trip and fall over them. Not Capricorn. He may glance
briefly behind him with pity for the failures, or in
grateful tribute for past advice and help, but he'll
soon continue his steady upward climb until his goal is
reached.
There are Capricorns who are deliciously romantic-
who understand the strange light of the moon and the
glorious colors of the butterfly's wing. But they won't
let their emotions blind them to the facts. Not if
they're typical Saturn people. If Capricorn writes a
lovely poem, full of imagination and illusion, the theme
will be solid and the punctuation will be correct. It
will come to the point, and the sentiment will never be
allowed to slosh over the edges. Don't defy the
conventions if you want the respect of the goat. Even
the more daring ones, and they are the exceptions, will
observe at least the outer trappings of social
acceptability. Public scenes and raw, naked,
uncontrolled passions embarrass them.
An occasional Capricorn will forget to hide his
ambition, and refuse to work unless he's at the head of
things. Then he becomes a stubborn goat who insists on
starting at the top of the ladder, where he feels he
belongs. Naturally, such an attitude produces a gloomy,
pessimistic, cold and selfish person who's impossible to
satisfy. But a couple of hard bumps usually suffice to
set him on the right path.
Young Capricorns are typically more contented than
older Capricorns, and there's a good reason. In almost
Chinese-fashion, the Saturn-ruled youngsters idolize
ancestors and elders. Respect for the wisdom of age and
experience is ingrained in the Saturnine nature. When
they mature and the "honorable ancestors" and the old
folks are gone, the wild actions of the modern
generation can frighten and bewilder the conservative
goats. They go about saying, "Teh, tch!" shaking their
heads and murmuring about the good old days. Luckily,
however, a fair percentage of them adapt to meet the
challenge. It's a warm thing to watch a gray-haired
Capricorn cheerfully cavorting with youth, learning for
the first time the joys of childhood he missed as a
serious youngster. Older Capricorns either behave like
frustrated dill pickles, or they happily roll hoops and
dance the bugaboo. A few of them, caught in the
uncomfortable middle, grin with suppressed excitement as
they sit on the sidelines and tap their feet in time to
the music, but never quite gather the courage to jump on
the carousel.
You'll seldom find the straight, well-shaped
Capricorn nose stuck in other people's business or the
Saturn tongue wagging in gossip. If the Sun sign is
combined with afflicted Gemini or Pisces influences,
there may be a little gabbiness, but normally they're
content to mind their own affairs. They won't often hand
out unsolicited advice, but when you deliberately seek
their practical wisdom, they won't hesitate to give it
with stem overtones. They'll expect you to accept it,
too. The Capricorn has learned to cope with duty and
responsibility and to tolerate frustration. If you
can't follow his example, he'll waste little time trying
to teach you, and allow you only a pinch of sympathy.
You may read that Capricorns marry for money or
social position. That's an exaggeration, though I will
say that it was doubtless a Capricorn who remarked,
"It's just as easy to fall in love with the conductor as
it is to have a fling with the second violin." The
practical goat rarely leaps into business or marriage
unless he's prepared financially for the former and
emotionally for the latter. These people will do strange
things for security. Old age is constantly on the
Saturnine mind. Even the young Capricorns will
instinctively enjoy visiting Uncle Jasper or Aunt
Minerva. After all, the doting relatives might have a
few bonds or some property, besides the fact that
they're comfortable and familiar. One certainly
wouldn't want to see a fortune willed to a pet canary.
You may think such an attitude is cold and calculating,
but to the Capricorn, it's sensible. Opportunity never
has to knock twice at the goat's door. He'll hear the
first knock. In fact, he's been leaning against the
door, listening and waiting for it.
In childhood, Capricorns are inclined to be weaker,
more sickly than other youngsters, but both strength and
resistance to disease increase with age. The sober,
temperate nature of the typical goat gives him amazing
endurance- and such potential for survival that it's not
unusual to find him living past the century mark. Saturn
people should be able to avoid doctors and hospitals,
but they don*t, because fear, uncertainty, worry and
gloom are deadlier than germs. No amount of practical
diet, conservative habits and stubborn resistance to
illness can overcome the dangers of pessimism.
Capricorns who want to avoid sickness should have plenty
of outdoor exercise, and develop a more positive,
outgoing personality. The fresh air of the country and
the fresh breezes of tolerance will work magic with
Saturnine health. Almost all goats of both sexes have
sensitive skin. There may be nervous rashes, allergies,
roughness and chapping, some peculiarity of
perspiration, enlarged pores or acne. Stomach disorders
from incompatible foods and mental distress are common.
Broken arms and legs may occur. The knee caps, joints
and bones are vulnerable areas, and psychosomatic
paralysis, severe headaches and kidney infections are
further fruits of Saturnine melancholy.
They will either have beautiful, white,
strong-teeth-or constant problems with decay and
continual visits to the dentist, one or the other.
Generally speaking, if they avoid the lingering
illnesses caused by lingering depressions, the Capricorn
tenacity for life is remarkable. But it's no fun to be
the last leaf on the tree if you're suffering from
arthritis and rheumatism. The goat must seek the
sunlight and laugh at the rain to stay healthy.
He's such a shy, sweet soul, a trifle stubborn
perhaps, but gentle about it. He seems so harmless. What
a safe person to trust and confide in-how pleasantly he
builds your ego. Who could hurt him or suspect him of
ambition? All the while, Capricorn is using your own
weaknesses, conceits and jealousies to make himself
stronger. He's useful and eventually so indispensable
that you ask him to take over the reins. Then hell rule
unobtrusively in the corner, modestly pulling the
strings of authority. The goat submerges his ego to
gain what his ego truly desires-the position of the real
leader. With kindly, but stem, cautious wisdom he guards
the past from neglect and protects the present from
confusion, so you can build tomorrow safely.
He doesn't have to lead the parade with a big brass
band. He gives permission for the parade, and plans its
route from behind the scenes. All the daring high-wire
acts need the Capricorn's strong, safe net when they
miscalculate and tumble. The discipline and formality
of jet black and navy blue-the solid practicality of
brown-the deep, honest dreams of dark green-these are
the quiet colors of his enduring rainbow. Walk slowly
through his silent forest, carpeted in soft moss and
climbing ivy-and seek the eight hidden treasures of
Saturn. Rich, red rubies lie buried beneath the
Capricorn, weeping willow. Stay- and learn the eternal
beauty of the pure, smooth onyx. Capricorn lead is
solid, and Capricorn coal builds lasting fires.
Famous Capricorn Personalities
Martin Luther King Rudyard Kipling Mao Tse-tung
Henry Miller Isaac Newton Richard Nixon Louis Pasteur
Edgar Allan Poe Helena Rubinstein Carl Sandburg Albert
Schweitzer Daniel Webster Woodrow Wilson
Steve Alien Humphrey Bogart Pablo Casals Nat King
Cole Benjamin Franklin Ava Gardner Barry Goldwater Cary
Grant Alexander Hamilton J. Edgar Hoover Howard Hughes
Joan of Arc Johannes Kepler Loretta Young
TOP
"Don't keep him waiting, child! Why, his time is
worth a thousand pounds a minute! And don't twiddle your
fingers all the time ... Better say nothing at
all. Language is worth a thousand pounds a word!"
He has a self-made brick wall around him. He's shy,
but he's strong and tough. He's pleasant, but he's
fiercely ambitious. Like the legendary, silent, earthy
cowboy, the Capricorn man seems to prefer to be alone.
He doesn't. Not really.
Secretly, Capricorn yearns for adulation. He'd love
to thrill the crowd on a flying trapeze. In his private
dreams, the goat is an incurable romantic, but Saturn
chains his nature. The stern planet of discipline
demands of him calm behavior, practical actions and
serious intent. This is his cross, and it's often a
heavy one to bear. Sometimes he'll cover his frustration
with a brusque manner-and sometimes he'll startle you
with unexpected and incongruous humor, although it will
always be the ironic tongue-in-cheek variety. But that's
often the funniest kind, and Capricorns can be quite a
gas when they're wry and dry and juggling the jokes.
Turn a steady, dependable Capricorn male inside out,
and you'll find a merry, gentle dreamer who longs for
the free wind to blow through his hair and finds the
sweet fragrance of compliments intoxicating-who hungers
for excitement and thirsts for adventure. Only a chosen
few can release this lonely soul from his secret prison.
Sun signs can be wonderfully helpful if you're
inclined to judge a book by its jacket. Here you were
thinking that Capricorn fellow would make a great school
teacher but a miserable lover. You'd just about decided
he'd rather be president than be yours. He impressed you
as a man who would rather see his name written in the
social register than in your diary. Now you discover
that he has a heart as warm and friendly as a cozy wood
fire on a winter night. I know it's exhilarating, but
wait just a moment before you dash off to give him a big
bear hug and expect him to -fly you to the moon. Those
surprises I just described are part of his inner nature.
He'll be thrilled and impressed if you guess, but inner
nature means just that-inner nature. Chances are
he'll never let all those gauzy dreams of careless
rapture escape and run around loose. Just so you know
they're inside him. That's enough. Don't go expecting
your Capricorn to dash barefoot through the buttercups.
You can't change his basic. Saturnine personality.
What you can do, however, is laugh at his shaggy dog
stories until he feels brave enough to tell more
sophisticated tales. You can hint that you think there
are banked fires beneath his conservative manner until
he has the confidence to let a flame or two leap out.
You can tell him you find his kind of dreams more
colorful, because no dream is as bright as the one that
really happens, so hell be encouraged to weave more of
them. Someday, he will reach the top of his special
mountain, and you'll be right there beside him, mighty
proud of your determined goat-and mighty glad you
believed in his practical dreams.
Capricorns pretend they can live without compliments,
and the way they behave when they get one is pretty
convincing proof. Did you ever say something nice to
your Capricorn man and see it fall as flat as the
expression on his face? Don't be hasty. Just because the
goat is such an expert at fooling himself doesn't mean
you have to be fooled, too. Actually, he desperately
needs to be told he is good, clever, handsome, desirable
and interesting, but since he'll seldom make his need
visible, he gets few orchids. Consequently, he may be a
little rusty, and won't know quite what to do when
someone openly admires him, so he covers his
embarrassment by making a wry joke or ignoring it, a
reaction which can freeze people into deciding never to
risk flattering that poker face again. The impression is
created that he hates compliments, so he gets even
fewer. It's a vicious circle. Maybe it's your fault more
than his. Next time you give your Capricorn a verbal
bouquet, look at his ears. See how pink they are? See
that faint twinkle in his eye and how his nose twitches
ever so slightly? He's as pleased as Sunday punch. Just
because he doesn't dance a jig or roll in the grass like
Leo, the lion, doesn't mean he hasn't been made deeply
happy and ten feet taller. He needs to be seen as the
truly great guy he is. Nature and the stars keep him
from advertising. You'll have to be his press agent.
This man is what horticulturists would call a late
bloomer. He's as serious as an owl in his youth, but
he'll relax gradually as he matures, and if he's a
typical Capricorn, he may end up as the youngest looking
and acting man in the group. Now, that's a point well
worth considering. With other men, you have to tolerate
flighty foolishness for years and then look forward to a
stuffy old age. With a Capricorn, you may have your
enthusiasms smothered a bit at first, but just think
what you have to look forward to! Your Capricorn lover
won't run off to Paris with you in the spring of your
romance, but he may take you to see the Taj Mahal by
moonlight forty or fifty years later, when other men are
complaining of creaking joints. It's not a bad switch.
If you're the kind who likes to stuff yourself first
with rich appetizers, and then dutifully have your
vegetables, he's not for you. A love affair with a
Capricorn man, provided it ends in marriage, is like
having dessert last, where it belongs.
Naturally; the Capricorn reverse aging process may
suggest to you that there's a catch in the faithfulness
department. There is. It's true that you'll have few
worries about your goat straying when romance is young
and dewy. It's also true that he may kick up his heels a
little as he grows older. Still, with all that, he's a
safer bet for fidelity than most other Sun signs,
because the Capricorn man practically bums incense at
the family altar. Whatever minor indiscretions he may
contemplate when his late blooming begins, they'll never
replace the home fires, the children and you. He's
almost reverent about "family ties. That includes the
family he's created with you and his own family, which
has been the object of his devotion since childhood.
It wouldn't do to insult his mother or be cool to his
brother. Be prepared to love your in-laws, even if
they're about as lovable as prickly cactus. Not only
will he defend them, but also if you allow disputes to
get sticky, the strain of choosing between loyalties to
two families can make him morose and gloomy. (If there's
anything in this t world you don't want to do,
it's make a Capricorn morose | and gloomy.)
You may bump into a Capricorn who has open con-|
tempt for his relatives, or who has bitterly cut family
ties | and never looked back-but scratch the surface of
his in-| dependence and you'll find a deep, emotional
wound in his | past that originally caused such
untypical behavior. Many | Capricorn men live at home
long past the age when their j friends are out enjoying
the delights of a bachelor pad. j They usually fall in
love later than most men too-and | they seldom marry
before they're settled in a career.
With an eye for pedigree and perfection, they'll look
| around pretty carefully. The goat will pick a girl who
will be a good mother. Then she'll have to be a good
cook and ' housekeeper. After that, she'll have to dress
well to impress his business associates and friends, and
preferably be a cut i above them in background, manners,
breeding and intelligence. Last of all, he'll make a
quick check to see if she's I beautiful or if she
appeals to his physical senses. You can see right away
it's no big deal if your hair is droopy, your l perfume
bottle is empty or your legs aren't the kind to ;
make the current Miss Universe hate you. Just dig into
the trunk for those D.A.R. papers and show him the
family
Wedgwood. Take his mother to lunch once a week, and
let him see how practical you are with your budget.
Invite your four-year-old sister along on your next
date. If you're an only child, rent a neighbor's
toddler. Wipe her little nose gently and frequently with
a proper linen handkerchief, talk about your desire to
be on the mayor's committee for civic improvement, walk
sedately, drop a few French phrases and gurgle when you
see a baby in a buggy. Be sure to respect his father as
the wisest gentleman you've ever met, and make casual
references to your great uncle, who helped Carnegie
build his empire-or your ancestor who fought by George
Washington's side in the snows of Valley Forge (it
doesn't matter which). If you're pretty, so much the
better. But glamour will never replace that afghan you
made for his cousin Bessie. I can almost promise that
he'll never marry you if you don't pass inspection with
his family. There are exceptions, of course, but they're
so rare you'd be downright reckless to gamble that your
Capricorn man is one of them.
After his family has proposed-or rather after he has
proposed-put your foot down. Firmly. Let him know you
love his folks dearly, but he's the one whose bed and
board you've chosen to share. Otherwise, you'll spend
many a Saturday night cooking dinner for his Uncle
Charlie or helping his young sister through her painful
adolescence.
Since Capricorns are always slightly nervous in the
presence of the opposite sex, an occasional one will
awkwardly hint at off-color situations, fumble with
attempts at innuendo, or appear to be rough, tough and
callous. It's just his way of being one of the fellows,
a typical method of hiding his embarrassment and
curiosity about the purple passions of more aggressive
people. Don't ever let it lead you into thinking he
wants you to play Bonnie to his Clyde. You are not Mae
West or Texas Guinan. You are a lady and don't ever
forget it. He may cast a furtive, interested glance at a
lady of the evening, but she's definitely not the kind
of lady he marries. This may sound like advice from your
spinster Aunt Abigail, but if you think it's square, go
on and wear your teeny bikini and green mascara- pour on
the perfume and kiss him in public. You may eventually
walk down the aisle in a white veil, but it wont be
beside a Saturn groom.
A nice gift for your Capricorn husband would be a
book of poems, the more romantic the better. If you
don't train him early in the art of affectionate
expression, you may become a well-provided-for wife
who's adored and warmly appreciated-with a perfect dear
for a husband-but who is also emotionally starved. It
won't do any good by that time to complain that he never
tells you he loves you. He'll just look at you in
injured innocence or grumbling disgust (depending on how
strong Saturn was at his birth), and patiently explain
that "You're crazy. I distinctly remember telling you I
loved you when I gave you your engagement ring and again
when little Calvert was born."
He thinks you should know how he feels about you
since be supports you, and pays you the tribute of
allowing you to bear his children, sweep his floors and
polish his trophies. To Capricorn, mushy, verbal
declarations are gilding the romantic lily. He may ask,
"What do you want, Richard Burton?" That's your cue to
say "yes" loudly. It should startle him a little. He
won't turn into Richard Burton, but he may be shocked
into realizing that a gently murmured "sweetheart" at
appropriate times won't harm his masculinity.
As a father, hell be a Father-the literal
personification of the word. He'll always be at the head
of the table, and that goes for picnics, too. Even if
he's the one sitting on the poison ivy, near the ant
hill, around the paper cloth spread under the trees-the
spot where the Capricorn daddy sits is the head of the
table. He'll demand respect and obedience, and hell
insist on routine and discipline. But he'll repay it
with honest devotion, even self sacrifice, probably
approve of big, happy birthday parties and a very merry
Christmas. Capricorn fathers are highly unlikely to
spare the rod and spoil the child. He'll see that they
go to the dentist and do their homework, with a few
trips to the old woodshed when it's necessary. His own
sense of organization and dependability will be
emphatically conveyed. It certainly won't hurt the
youngsters, though it might take a little starch out of
them. Remind him that parenthood can be fun, as well as
a serious responsibility. Think of him as a Charles
Dickens type papa. Teach the children to give him
generous goodnight kisses, and encourage him to take
them to the ball game, fishing or swimming. If he's a
little strict, remember that they'll profit in the long
run, as long as he doesn't overdo it. When the
grandchildren bounce on his knee, he'll turn shockingly
permissive. Capricorn grandpas make great baby sitters.
I even know one who roller skates around the block
with his second generation offspring.
A Capricorn man will seldom marry in haste and repent
at leisure. He's more apt to marry at leisure and repent
in haste. Most Capricorn marriages are solid, but if the
goat makes a mistake, he'll walk out abruptly, and his
wife won't get a second chance. Capricorn abhors
divorce, so it won't happen often, but when it does,
it's final. To be blunt, when he's had it-he has had it.
Your Saturnine husband may regulate love-making to a
schedule, along with shopping, correspondence, doing his
banking, visiting museums or art galleries and cleaning
his gun and trophy collection. It may seem cold and
unsentimental, but remember that the practical
Capricorn is interested in the physical side of love
long after other husbands resort to poetry to express
their emotions. Interpreted, that means just what I
said back at the beginning. Dessert last. After he's
retired, he'll have more time to develop his technique
of affection. That's better than insurance. And you'll
have that too, with a Capricorn husband-insurance
against a rainy day, insurance against loneliness and
insurance against the blows of a sordid, ugly world. Any
sensible female appreciates the value of Saturn
devotion. He won't be a fiery lover who courts you with
starry eyes and passionate, flowery speeches. But he'll
protect you from all your feminine fears. He's a tough
guy with a gentle heart. He'll chop the wood for that
cozy fire, then sit with you in front of it and hold
your hand tenderly. No matter how many gray hairs, extra
pounds or wrinkles you add as the years slip by, to him
you'll always look like the girl who made him say "I
love you." When you stop to think about it, why should
he say it again and again? Once is enough when it lasts
that long.
TOP
So she got up and walked about-
rather stiffly just at first,
as she was afraid that the crown might come off:
but she comforted herself with the thought
that there was nobody to see her,
"and if I really am a Queen," she said,
as she sat down again,
"I shall be able to manage it quite well in time."
There's no such think as a typical Capricorn female.
She can be a museum curator who wears granny glasses for
real, or she can be a dancer who wears a glittering
G-string for fun. You'll see her crisply running a
suburban P.T.A., frying hamburgers in a coffee shop, or
organizing the biggest Charity Ball in the city. A
Capricorn woman may decorate the society columns, smile
demurely behind a political candidate husband or pour
mysterious liquids into test tubes. But whatever she's
doing and whatever she's wearing, Saturn will rule her
actions and her secret aims.
She can be ultra-feminine, flirtatious and charming
enough to make a man feel like a giant grizzly bear who
can protect her from the cold, cruel world. Or she can
be icy, quiet and aloof, sitting securely on her marble
pedestal and challenging you to be clever enough to win
her superior hand. Whichever personality she projects,
underneath her womanly wiles or her practical, sensible
manner, she has the same goal-a steely determination to
snag the right man, who can become important, make her
proud and be a good father to her children.
So many Capricorn women are career girls, you might
think love and marriage would always be a second choice.
With love, you have a point. With marriage, no. The
thing to understand is that the Capricorn goals
are security, authority, respect and position. It makes
little difference if these needs are supplied in front
of a blackboard as a school teacher, behind a desk as an
executive, or beside an ambitions husband whose social
life and home she can manage with easy grace and careful
planning. One way or another, the Capricorn woman will
get her recognition. Some of them get it by writing
books, lecturing, painting or composing music. It's
surprising how many Capricorns of both sexes have
unusual artistic talent. Perhaps it stems from an
innate sense of balance and harmony, knowing what is
pleasing and what is right or correct.
This is a little delicate, but even the Saturn
females you find in burlesque theaters or engaging in
the world's oldest profession (there will be only a
handful) will end up by marrying the top comic or the
theater owner in the first instance-or the wealthiest
client in the second. The goat must climb. Whether the
starting position is high or low, the top of the hill is
where she finds the view more satisfying. There's
nothing flashy about the Capricorn female. You'll
certainly never see her loudly or obviously pushing and
shoving for first place; you may even think she's docile
enough to contentedly take a back seat to her
competition.
Wait. See who gets the promotion.
Don't be misled into thinking she'll never sacrifice
her career for marriage. Just give this girl half a
chance to be a social leader and the mistress of a
well-run household, and you'll see how quickly she loses
interest in her job (one of the few things she'll do
quickly). If you need her to, the Capricorn woman will
gladly continue working to help you climb up the
mountain of success-she won't be lazy. Otherwise,
however, she's happier enjoying her position as your
wife, provided the position is a good one, and there's
enough financial security.
One of the most typical and delightful things about
this woman is her natural breeding and grace of manner.
You can meet a Capricorn girl who was raised in a
one-room shack across the railroad -tracks, or whose
father works the swing shift in a coal mine, but unless
she decides to reveal her background (which she probably
won't), you'll be convinced she comes from an old-line
family, and was turned out by one of the best finishing
schools. Such is the Capricorn built-in sense of social
grace and conservative, conventional appearances.
Any man who's involved in a relationship with the
female goat should learn a basic fact about this Sun
sign. She seems to be more even-tempered and emotionally
steady than she actually is. Her manner may convince you
that she's as firm as a rock and nothing can ruffle her
calm surface. The truth is that she's subject to many
moods. All women are subject to moods, you say, but the
Capricorn girl can have some really black and
long-lasting ones. If she feels mistreated or
unappreciated, she'll brood for days, weeks, even
months. She calls it being sensible or practical, but
Saturnine gloominess, pessimism and depression are much
more deeply rooted than that. They're triggered by fear
of the future, worry about the present, shame over the
past-or a suspicion that she's being made fun of or is
inadequate in some way. These women do not accept
teasing lightly. Keep it at a minimum. To be honest,
they find it impossible to see the joke when they're the
victims. You don't have to bury her in compliments
constantly (she'll sense when they're insincere,
anyway), but don't kid her about important matters, and
praise her often enough to make her realize you know her
true value.
It's hard for her to relax in romantic situations.
There's plenty of physical desire under the cool
Capricorn surface, far more than most people suspect,
and it's never satisfied casually. Sitting around and
wasting time with breathless hugs and ecstatic kisses
while the future is still hanging unsettled is
definitely not her favorite hobby-yet once she's decided
you're the right man and the finances are secure or your
ambition is sufficient, shell be as warm as a cuddly
panda, affectionate, and even passionate. Capricorns
don't believe in vague dreams that glide aimlessly
through a misty, blue sky. They want to know where the
ship of romance is taking them, and that it's sailing on
safe waters. Build a firm foundation under your house if
you plan to carry a Capricorn girl over the threshold.
Make sure there's plenty of insurance and the mortgage
is paid off or will be soon.
Shell probably be something of a social butterfly,
extremely aware of etiquette, and she'll lean toward
quaint customs like engraved napkin rings and
needlepoint chairs. Things must be correct and tradition
must be observed at all costs. She may have an
inconsistent habit of wanting to shop in the most
expensive, exclusive stores, yet insisting on a bargain.
She doesn't mind buying a dress that's on sale, as long
as it bears the right label.
Capricorn women have a fresh beauty of their own.
You'll rarely find one who's not unusually attractive.
Yet they are timid and unsure about their appearance,
and you may find them needing constant reassurance that
they're pretty. Although Capricorn females hate
dishonesty in all forms, they're not above lying about
their ages. They usually get away with it, too, thanks
to the odd Saturn aging twist. They look like little old
ladies as children, then bloom suddenly into women who
look like young girls when they're past the prime of
life.
It would be a terrible mistake to snub her family.
The man who marries a Capricorn girl marries her
relatives. There's no point in thinking that yours is
different. She's not. Somewhere along the line, you'll
stop laughing at mother-in-law jokes (you may cry
instead). Many times, the Saturn female is the sole
support of her family, financially or morally or both.
She may care for an ill parent with devotion to the
point of relinquishing the idea of marriage completely.
Often, she'll enjoy the sacrifice because of her honest
love for her family, but even if she resents it, her
strong sense of responsibility and duty will not permit
her to escape.
You might as well resign yourself to flattering your
mother-in-law, and hope she's a great gal who's worth
it. Don't argue politics with her father, and if you
must criticize her brothers and sisters, see that the
criticism is constructive, and based on a sincere belief
in their potentialities. Frequently, Capricorns find
themselves burdened with distressed or invalid
relatives, and the typical goats will never let love,
however consuming it might be, cause them to neglect
such obligations. You'd better start right out by
planning to have a guest room or two for visiting
relatives. But there's a reverse benefit. You'll have a
wife who is kind and considerate toward your own
family. The Capricorn girl will understand if you have
to allocate a fixed sum to your parents each week, and
she'll probably be a companion to your brothers and
sisters. She's the kind of girl you take home to meet
mother, and mother approves of her immediately. Since
men are so contrary, such instant encouragement can
cause them to back away. It's always more fun to fight
objections for your lady fair. But you'll only be
slicing off your nose to spite your heart, because your
mother is right. The Capricorn girl, if she's a typical
Saturn woman, will make an excellent wife. The home of a
Capricorn woman often looks so effortlessly spotless and
smooth-running you'd think there were little fairies and
elves hiding in the comers, working away furiously after
midnight to shine and polish and cook and clean. Wrong.
The very last place you can expect to find such
imaginary creatures is around a Capricorn. The Saturn
practicality and faith in firm facts ordinarily
precludes any sympathy with the unseen. A Capricorn
girl wouldn't believe in leprechauns if one sat right on
the tip of her nose. In all fairness, however, although
she may not be a way-out dreamer or a follower of occult
mysteries, once she has the solid facts she's able to
see the romance and poetry in the most ordinary
situations.
Hers is an earthy kind of beauty that can make even
the gross and ugly seem lovely with sheer usefulness.
She's not a stranger to the gypsy spell of the north
wind, nor is she deaf to the silver song of spring
showers and the call of a lonely skylark. Great music
stirs her deeply, and she's an enchanted patron of
almost any art form. Perhaps she has to see and touch
magic to believe in it. A leprechaun would probably get
much further with her if he came right out and said
where that pot of gold is hidden, instead of hinting
about it in fairy tales.
Most Capricorns save their rainbow thinking for
history and heroic deeds of the past. Since she worships
tradition, and reveres those who have overcome obstacles
to gain success, it's easier for her to get sentimental
over the Gettysburg address than to get enthusiastic
over your latest wild scheme. Actually, she's a true
romantic, with greater imagination than the
scatterbrains with unreal fantasies. Every January girl
has haunting poetry in her soul, but she doesn't have
much sympathy for poets who starve in attics. Take care
of the food and rent and then pursue the dream, whatever
it may be, is the Capricorn motto. Also make sure that
the dream is worth pursuing. She sees nothing
glamorous or magical about failure.
You may have to share your Capricorn wife with
causes. She'll be a tireless worker for the poor and the
defenseless, but she may prefer to show her charity in
group efforts, rather than to individuals. Saturnine
sympathies are usually organized, seldom scattered.
Female Capricorns are natural leaders of women's clubs.
She'll probably instill both thrift and a respect for
quality in the youngsters. She'll teach them to "Eat it
up, wear it out, make it do or do without." Still,
they'll be served the best cuts of meat, and she'll buy
them the finest make of shoes. To her, economy does not
have to mean cheap. The children will be expected to be
polite to relatives and elders, and they'll probably
learn excellent manners. They won't be pampered or
allowed to willfully disobey. If you give her a book on
child psychology, she may use it to paddle an unruly
offspring and get around to reading it later. Sticky
kisses may not be welcome, but few mothers are more
devoted than the female goat. Her children will get a
courteous listening ear. She may be a little strict and
unsympathetic to their growing pains, but she'll be a
fascinated audience for their achievements. The child
who runs home from school and shouts, "Guess what I
learned today," won't be ignored by the Capricorn
mother, who will never be too busy to give her
youngsters her interest and attention. After they become
teenagers, there may be a few barriers when the Saturn
conservatism clashes with youth's liberalism. At this
point, she may need some help in understanding her
children's enthusiastic dreams. She may learn the hard
way that she can't dictate their friendships and
confine them to "acceptable" people. But she's
intelligent enough to adjust and pull in her horns if it
looks as though she'll lose more than she'll gain.
Since many Capricorn females have sensitive skin,
they don't wear much make-up. Lots of them are allergic
to it. But nature rewarded them with natural beauty that
needs little gilding, and they'll keep it long after the
roses have faded from the cheeks of other women. Some of
them startle you with lovely complexions, firm features
and bright eyes at the age of eighty and older.
Patiently help your Capricorn woman overcome her lack
of personal confidence. She's not unimaginative just
because she doesn't court delusion. Try on a couple of
her practical dreams for size, and you'll find they're
surprisingly comfortable. Stubbornness may be one of her
vices, but she's not a whiner or a nervous nag. She'll
push you toward success, yet be tender and devoted. In
spite of her modest, often gentle ways, she'll know just
how to twist you around her little finger. There's a
deep richness in her love that's more lasting than the
brittle, scorching, demanding love of other women. Who
says she doesn't believe in fairy tales? Only a wise
Capricorn maiden could look deep into the eyes of an
awkward frog and see that he's really a prince in
disguise. Not only that-if you marry her, youll never
run out of clean socks.
TOP
"Oh, how I -wish I could shut up like a telescope!
I-think I could, if I only knew how to begin ..."
"Pat her on the head, and see how pleased she'll be!...
A little kindness- and putting her hair in papers-
would do wonders with her-"
If you're one of those people mothers hate, because
you think all newborn infants look like little old men
and women, save your description for a Capricorn baby,
and you won't get so much resistance. Tiny Capricorns do
resemble miniature octogenarians. They look old in their
youth and young in their old age. That little wrinkled
prune of a face in the bassinet will someday be smooth
and un-lined when other faces are sagging. Maybe it has
something to do with being born in January-the old year
going out and the New Year coming in. The odd turnabout
does match the familiar image of the old man with his
care-lined face beside the fresh infant of the New Year
with his Ivory soap look.
If you have a Capricorn child, you'll notice the
inconsistency soon enough. From the time he's an infant,
your self-contained little Cappy will make you feel
somewhat uneasy with his strange maturity. You'll say
something cheerful to him, like "Does itty bitty Baby
Boo want a nicey sugar cake?" and he'll give you a
serious, thoughtful look, exactly as though he's
wondering just how silly you can get. It doesn't take
many of those looks to shame the average parent right
out of baby talk.
Capricorn youngsters are strong-willed and positive
in their tastes, but they don't make a big fuss in
expressing them. Your little goat won't throw a temper
tantrum or dramatically pound his fist in the mashed
potatoes, but he'll manage to communicate his negative
reactions quite plainly. A mother may feel vaguely
intimidated by a Capricorn baby, but she can't put her
finger on the exact reason. Somehow he makes her
feel-well, he makes her feel foolish and naughty. Let's
be very truthful. He makes her feel like the child,
instead of the parent.
This infant isn't the kind to waver or succumb to
wishful thinking. He crawls or waddles deliberately to
the place he wants to reach. You rather get the feeling
he organized it all carefully in his mind while you were
changing his diaper, and now he's going to follow
through. He's nothing if not definite. Capricorns are
never coy about making their wishes known. You get the
message clearly. Then they steadily wait for your
answer. Suppose you say "no." If it isn't anything
important, he will probably accept the disappointment
without tearful scenes. If it's something he's decided
he really wants, he'll get it, one way or another. Your
"no" will mean little to him. Instead of fighting it,
he'll ignore it and bide his time until he finally wears
you down and you give in.
As he grows older, your Capricorn offspring will
begin to organize his life into a routine. He'll keep
his toys in a certain place, and will be quite put out
if you move them or disturb his system. If he's a
typical Saturn child, hell usually adapt naturally to
mealtime schedules and potty time, and he'll have less
interest in childish tricks or youthful pranks than
other youngsters. Even when they're very small, these
boys and girls will show a decided preference for home
life. The little goat would rather go on a picnic with
mother and dad, or sit home and listen to the grown-ups
talk, than run outside with a group of children his own
age. He'll seldom have a gang of friends. There will
probably be only a few close companions, or maybe just
one special friend with whom he shares secrets.
School is seldom a struggle for young Capricorn
students. Unless he has a conflicting ascendant or the
Moon was in a restless sign at birth, this youngster
will be remarkably responsible about homework. He will
walk into the house, hang up his coat, and sit down
immediately to tackle his lessons. If he's a true
Capricorn, he can't enjoy his play until he's first
attended to duty.
When he's ready for leisure, the Saturn play often
takes the form of pretending to be an adult. Little
Capricorn girls love to play dress-up in their mother's
clothes. Sometimes they'll suggest, "You be the baby and
I'll be the Mommy," which could make you a bit
uncomfortable, because the tot will be strangely
convincing in the reverse role. You'll feel like a
complete fool, standing in the playpen and gurgling
while she peers over her big spectacles, wearing your
high heels and pearls, and says firmly, "Do be still or
you'll go to bed without any supper." You get the
impression you'd better stop the play quickly, or she
really will put you to bed. Sometimes the Capricorn
child will become a "pretend" parent for small pets and
be quite serious about the responsibility. Little
Capricorn boys like to pretend they're teachers,
doctors, executives of big railroads or Daddy. When
your little son puts on your husband's topcoat and
picks up his pipe, you may get the oddest urge to ask
him to drive over to the supermarket and bring home some
eggs-until you remember he can't drive anything more
complicated than a scooter, and he skins his knees most
of the time on that. Capricorn children also like to
paint or draw and listen to music, but they won't waste
many leisure hours in aimless games. Frequently they'll
be absorbed in making something practical. It will have
a useful purpose, even if it's a pretty skinny pot
holder or a comically wobbly pencil box. They should be
encouraged to play outdoors. They won't seek the
sunshine and fresh air with much enthusiasm, but it's
good for them; it blows those gloomy little Saturn
cobwebs out of their young minds.
Teachers usually find the Capricorn child pleasant to
instruct, but they may lose patience with his slow,
stubborn methods of learning. Still, the teacher will
seldom complain of frivolous daydreaming or neglect of
studies. These youngsters are normally very good
scholars, after they've grasped the fundamentals. They
don't learn quickly or project flashy brilliance, but
they're thorough and careful. Saturn concentration is
nothing to sneeze at. It wins prizes and gets A's.
When your young goat brings home a report card with
behavior marks that say he's obedient, studious and
reliable, but "he's reluctant to participate in class
discussions," "refuses to recite," "is timid, lacks
confidence and doesn't mix well with the other
students," you'll begin to worry that you've raised an
introverted bookworm, a hopelessly anti-social creature.
Then one day your little Capricorn will casually mention
that he has to be in school early to call the roll. "Why
do you have to call the roll?" youll ask. The answer
will be a shock. "Oh, because I'm President of the
class." When you exclaim, "Why didn't you tell us?"
he'll reply with offhand modesty, "Gee, it isn't that
important." But he'll be blushing and pleased. It's the
pattern for his adult life. Apparently slower than the
others, supposedly a poor mixer and the dark horse,
he'll quietly and inevitably end up in some position of
leadership, as the extroverts realize he's the one they
can trust to be responsible. Capricorn may be left to
guard the treasures and keep the records, while the
gregarious ones play and dream but he won't feel imposed
upon. What he seeks are respect and authority.
An occasional Capricorn youngster will coldly dictate
to weaker friends or siblings with a stubborn will,
which can amount to childish cruelty, but far more often
the Capricorn child will submit to more dominant Sun
signs. There may then be a problem of brothers or
sisters bossing the little goat, and you'll think he's
being pushed around unfairly. Don't worry. He can take
care of himself. One little Capricorn girl I know is
completely submissive to her older, more aggressive
Sagittarian sister. With the patience of the earth signs
she takes orders from the more fiery personality. She
never talks back or argues. But after an especially
severe bossing session, the older sister just happens to
find her shoes, her hairbrush or her favorite sweater is
"missing." It always turns up eventually, and no one in
the family ever has the slightest idea how it got
"lost," but for weeks afterwards, the bossy sister is
more considerate. Never underestimate the power of
Capricorn for self-preservation. Somehow, the odds get
evened.
Around members of the opposite sex, little goats will
be bashful, but intensely interested. You'll hear
remarks like, "Boys are drippy goons," and "Girls are
stupid creeps," but they'll get mysteriously excited
about Valentine's Day in school, and send a bushel of
cards signed "guess who." Romantically, adolescence can
be painful. They'll need encouragement and careful
handling when dating begins.
It's a blessing to be the parents of a January boy or
girl. With very few exceptions, it's like a gift from
the gods. Unless he's pushed too far, in which case he
can say something bluntly cruel and freezingly painful,
the Capricorn child will usually be as sweet as the
"sugy cake" he hates.
If you're short on the rent money you can always
borrow a few twenties from his fat piggy bank. He'll be
polite to his elders, and mind almost without being
asked, except for rare stubborn spells. He'll organize
his chores, and be serious about his future, though you
may have to force him to scrub behind his ears. He'll
cling to home and family with honest devotion, and
seldom make you wonder where he is. Most of the time,
he'll be right there beside you, enjoying every minute.
He has his own bright, solid and practical dreams. Don't
worry if he snubs Sleeping Beauty and
Goldilocks. When you're old and gray, and feeling
lost and forgotten by a thoughtless younger generation,
your Capricorn son or daughter will sincerely respect
your wisdom. He'll be enthusiastic about inviting you to
visit or even to make your home with him. It's for all
the world as if the Capricorn youngster is saying-for
real this time-"All right, now I'll be the Mommy (or
Daddy), and you be the baby. You took care of me
with love. Now I'll take care of you." There'll be no
make-believe about it, but Hans Christian. Andersen
never wrote a happier ending,
TOP
"I told them once, I told them twice:
they would not listen to advice."
"Now I growl when I'm pleased, and wag my tail
when I'm angry' Therefore I'm mad."
I know a Capricorn boss who's just about as typical
of the Sun sign as you can get. He's the major domo of
the world of a famous male singer from Hoboken. Few
people know it. There are no neon signs spelling his
name, and columnists don't print juicy tidbits about his
activities. You'll never see his face on the cover of
Time, but you may have to pass his inspection before
you get the chance to try to sell any glamorous ideas to
the Idol.
This goat sits firmly behind his desk, efficiently
tying up all the loose ends and dangling strings in the
amazingly intricate life of the famous personality. This
can range from meeting the singer's relatives at the
airport to buying a yacht or renting the floodlights for
a premiere. He calmly handles hot potatoes like law
suits and tax problems by delegating the right potato
into the right accountant's or attorney's oven for
baking, making sure it neither stays raw nor gets
burned. His phone rings constantly with S.O.S. calls
from other members of the widespread entourage; and he
knows just who is where and why and when they're coming
back. He keeps four million statistics in his head,
including top secret information reporters would give an
eye tooth to learn, the opening scene of a
twenty-year-old movie, the box office figures of a
current film, and the fastest source of catered hot
spaghetti with Italian cheese sauce.
His day never ends. It starts at dawn, and midnight
finds him winding up the schedule of orders he'll see
are executed promptly the next morning. Often, he
shaves, showers and dresses at the office. Anyone who
really knows the score will tell you that certain bedlam
would result if he ever disappeared from the frantic
scene. He'd look grossly out of place in a discotheque,
and he has a vaguely uncomfortable look in nightclubs,
where duty demands he show his poker face on occasion.
This particular executive goat has a strange base of
operations on an entire floor of a Manhattan building.
In addition to the outer rooms and reception hall,
there's a huge space for his private den. In one comer
is a large circular desk for the mountain of papers that
require his daily attention. The rest of his private
domain is furnished with two big couches, several
over-stuffed chairs, coffee tables, heavy draperies,
lamps, book cases and mossy, cushioned carpeting. He
even has a dining room, with a table big enough to seat
the Mets for lunch, china closets, mirrors, dishes,
silver and glasses. The walls are covered with patterned
paper, and there are several tanks of expensive
tropical fish lining the room. You would think you were
in someone's home instead of in the busy office of an
important executive.
That's exactly where you are. Since he must spend so
many hours away from his home, this Capricorn boss
simply brought it with him. Other bosses may enjoy the
commercial world, and be glad to get away from home, but
not the goat. Home is sacred. At almost any hour, you'll
find this particular Capricorn's relatives around.
Family life is never neglected for business.
Since he's such a typical Saturn boss his habits tell
a lot about all Capricorn executives. He's a kindly
father image to those who work for him-stern, but fair.
He insists on obedience to duty, and woe betide the
employee who forgets to feed his velvet-tailed guppies.
He seldom raises his voice to give orders. His tone is
gruff, but normally quiet, except on rare occasions when
stupidity or careless mistakes cause him to bellow. At
these times, he resembles a glaring Monty Woolley.
Visitors are sometimes intimidated by his serious,
formal manner, but the staff has discovered his soft
heart, and they'll brook no criticism of him from
outsiders-though they may swear a little under their
breath, among themselves, when he cracks the whip. He
bums their ears off when they goof, but he comes up with
an extra fifty when it's needed, and he'll send his
secretary's mother flowers in the hospital. He seldom
goes in for compliments or flattery. A mumbled "Yeah,
that's good," is about as close as he comes to
extravagant praise. But he's a sympathetic listener to
his employees' personal troubles, and he makes sure they
eat right and wear their boots when it's raining. The
staff is like a family, with the Capricorn boss
unquestionably the head of the house.
He doesn't hand out Christmas bonuses like Santa
Claus, but he's not stingy when an employee gets stuck
in Las Vegas on a vacation without the plane fare home,
or when the guy Friday he keeps hopping like a jack
rabbit has a doctor's bill that can't be paid on his
salary. (In the Vegas instance, he'll wire the return
trip ticket, rather than the cash, and it will be
tourist class. Wastefulness is not one of his hobbies.)
Although he's gruff, he can also be gentle and timid.
A compliment will turn his ears pink, though he'll
seldom acknowledge that he even heard it. Charity
solicitors can always get a check from him, and if the
charity is connected with children or the old folks,
he'll add an extra zero. He has to be reminded to rest
and eat his lunch, since responsibility causes him to
neglect his personal needs. Now and then he goes into a
black, melancholy mood of Saturnine depression, closes
his door, stares out the window on Central Park, and no
one dares disturb his privacy. Phone calls are held and
office problems kept on ice until the depression lifts.
He dresses in conservative, dark colors and subdued
styles, and he has a sort of grandfatherly-looking
pocket watch he frequently consults. He really looks
more as though he's connected with a staid bank than
with the leading swinger of these swingin' times. Most
of the bric-a-brac around his desk are antiques, and
there's a generous sprinkling of faded photos of his
wife, children and various, assorted relatives.
That's a Simon pure picture of a Capricorn boss. If
you keep the image in your mind, you'll have a pretty
good idea what to expect from any Saturn executive
including your own. If he has any spare time, he won't
waste it. He'll expect you to imitate him. Is the
switchboard quiet? Good. You'll have time to file those
letters. Is the schedule light today? Pine. You can move
those cartons in the stock room. Don't spend office time
polishing your nails, if you're his secretary-and don't
hang on the phone in the back office, talking with your
girl, if you're a male employee. Your Saturn boss will
materialize out of thin air, like a frowning, vengeful
genie. It wouldn't be wise to have your beatnik brother
with the beard and guitar visit you at the office. Even
the goat's religious devotion to family ties-his own and
yours-won't keep him from raising a conservative
eyebrow of disapproval. Female employees who reek of
perfume and male employees who practice putting in the
conference room won't find the office of a Capricorn
executive a happy home. As far as he's concerned, the
place for heavy perfume is in the bottle, and the place
for putting is on the golf course (preferably at the
best country club).
He's always impressed with the status of those who
have inched a few toeholds above him on the mountain of
success, so you'll make a hit if you're familiar with
the social register. If you didn't graduate from Vassar
or Harvard, then for goodness sakes at least have an
aunt or uncle who did.
Make sure he knows you take your mother to lunch
every Wednesday, or that you pay your younger brother's
tuition at prep school, and you're sure to get promoted.
Clean fingernails, courteous manners and perfect
grammar are necessities, and efficient work without
whining or complaints will be a requirement. Never call
him by his first name in front of strangers, and never
breathe a word of criticism about his family in front of
anybody. For Christmas, give him a chipped and faded oil
painting of Thomas Jefferson you picked up in an antique
shop, or a rock you snitched last summer from the back
door of Nancy Hanks' birthplace. Capricorns revere
history and the past. Just don't tell him you snitched
the rock. They also revere scrupulous honesty. Polishing
apples won't get you ten cents extra in your pay
envelope. But understanding his lonely heart will gain
you his confidence. Others may see him as a firm, tough
disciplinarian with a heart of stone. Let him know you
see him for what he really is: a shy and sensitive soul,
who secretly longs to be free and casual, but knows he's
chained by Saturn's demands of obedience to order,
system and authority. He'll treat you like a son or
daughter. You'll get spanked when you're bad and
rewarded when you're good. But he won't let you down
when you're in trouble or lock the door when you need
help. Just don't forget to feed those velvet-tailed
guppies.
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"If everyone minded their own business,' said
the Duchess, in a hoarse growl, "The world would go
round a deal faster than it does."
Look around the office and see if you can spot him.
No fair sneaking a look at the birthdays in your
personnel records. You can forget about that original,
creative fellow with the bushy sideburns and the antler
tooth necklace. You can also cross off the sport who
brags about his pub cruising capers and his candlelight
conquests. They're not Saturn types.
Jolly George, who keeps the staff in a state of
perpetual panic with his not-quite-practical jokes,
definitely isn't a Capricorn. Neither is light-hearted
Louie, with the glib tongue and the bouncing baby
brainstorms-nor the new promotion manager with the
orange silk ascot, who keeps humming "My Father Was
the Keeper of the Eddystone
Light" in sales meetings.
How about that busy worker with the reserved manner
who wears suspenders and parts his hair in the middle?
The one with the quiet socks and a picture of his family
in an ostrich leather frame on his desk. He usually
comes in a few minutes early and leaves a few minutes
late. His head is fastened firmly to his shoulders, and
his pencil points are always sharp. The staff calls him
"Sir," salesmen call him "Mister," and you call him when
there's trouble. Of course he's a Capricorn.
Who else could you load up with a pile of work that
would stagger a horse-but not a goat? He's your
dependable safety valve when things get snarled and
disorganized, and he comes through for you without
making a big fuss about it. I doubt if he ever dashes
into your office. He walks in, and he probably checks
first to see if you're busy. His clothes and manner are
both conservative, and he's the only one in the bunch
who never gets caught without his umbrella when it
rains. He won't lose his brief case in the subway, or
forget where he left his lunch. His lunch? Naturally.
What else do you think he carries in that brown paper
bag? Restaurants are expensive. Besides, he hates to tip
and fight the crowds.
The last time you saw him flash a bright, toothpaste
grin was when your secretary mentioned she didn't know
how the office could run without him. He's not the
grinning type. Or the foolish, frivolous type. He may
tell quite a few jokes in his wry and dry way, or take a
discreet peek at a pretty girl, but Saturn will never
permit him to pull out all the stops. Most of the time,
he minds his own business. The Capricorn is more
inclined to frown sternly 00 the casual jollities of the
gay extroverts than to join them, although his own brand
of cynical humor can be hilarious. When he's in form,
it's hard to top him.
You have to admit he has unique and valuable assets.
Your Capricorn employee is the one you sic on the tough,
suspicious Internal Revenue man. When the goat gets
through with him, he's not as suspicious and far less
tough. He may even be courteous and respectful. It's not
everyone who can successfully intimidate a tax man.
Remember that high pressure character who wanted to sell
you several hundred dollars worth of perfumed typewriter
ribbons in rhinestone studded boxes to pep up your
secretaries' morale? After two minutes with your
Capricorn man, the poor soul was pressing the down
button on the elevator, looking like a fallen soufflé.
Somehow, you get the impression your Capricorn
employee is going to advance much higher in life, but
it's hard to figure how he conveys it. There's nothing
aggressive or openly ambitious about him. He's not a
flashy, ruthless climber. Let's try that again. He's not
a flashy climber. In his own mild, inconspicuous way,
the goat is coldly determined to get where he's going.
Those who prevent his steady progress or impose on him
will soon find he's no Casper Milquetoast. Hell accept
his responsibilities without complaint or resentment,
but he won't be pushed too far. Capricorns with severe
planetary afflictions in their natal birth charts can be
astonishingly cruel and ruthless. But the average goat
simply gives people a grumpy growl and a black look when
they tweak his horns.
Just in case you have one of the exceptions to the
rule in your office, I'd better tell you about a
Capricorn I knew who worked in a donut shop. He probably
had a Leo ascendant or the Moon was in Gemini or Aries
when he was born. This goat wore expensive, Italian
shoes and big cuff links. He made more romantic
conquests in a week than other men do in a lifetime-or
said he did. He enjoyed telling off-color stories, and
when he wasn't flirting with the women customers or
impressing everyone with his toughness, he tossed off
some pretty big bubble schemes and way-out promotions.
Most people would never peg him as a Capricorn, but they
should look a little closer and listen more carefully.
For all his outrageous flirting, when he called his
fiancée on the phone his tone was tender and protective.
A man who dared to swear in her presence would never
have tried it twice. He made it clear that she was a
lady. In front of his parents, he was subdued and
respectful. Anyone past fifty he treated with a courtesy
bordering on reverence. With children, he was as gentle
as Whistler's mother. Powerful, famous people with
status turned him into a humble, worshiping admirer. He
was constantly telling friends and strangers that he
once sat next to a glamorous movie actress on a plane or
about the time he was invited to a reception at the
Governor's mansion. Everything he bought was wholesale,
including those Italian shoes. He had the undisputed
first prize as the tightest tipper in town. A dollar
would never be spent where a dime could be saved. In
other words, underneath that false bravado was a typical
Saturn nature. This apparently aggressive, extroverted
goat turned pink at a compliment and painfully shy in
the presence of anyone he thought was upper register. If
you need any more proof that he was a Capricorn, he
eventually bought the chain of donut shops. And by the
way, he didn't risk his own cash on those wild
promotions. It was always somebody else's.
The typical Capricorn employee is conscientious
almost to a fault. If he makes a mistake or commits an
error of judgment, he's miserable. Falling down on his
job depresses him. He'll come back to the office and
work overtime if you need him, but he won't like it if
you make him miss dinner at home with his family too
many nights. The goat prefers to tend to his domestic
responsibilities first, and return later to the
grindstone, if necessary. You won't find him changing
jobs often. The Capricorn decides early what the goal
will be, and pursues it with unswerving persistence. He
is not flighty or undecided about his future. The top of
the mountain is never allowed to be obscured by the mist
of fanciful dreams and sentimental wishing. Titles
usually don't move him. He's not seeking glory. He's
after the real position of power: he wants to be the one
who guards the fort while the individualists and great
idealists are out chasing butterflies. He doesn't need
his name in gold letters on the door to feel important.
But don't fail to increase his area of responsibility at
decent intervals, and make sure you pay him enough money
so be can keep up with the Joneses. He has to live in
the right neighborhood, send his children to the right
schools, and his wife has to dress with more taste than
her friends. That takes substantial lettuce. The goat
will gladly chew on tough leather, pieces of steel and
old light bulbs to earn his dessert of green paper
lettuce, sprinkled with the caviar of social
distinction. His banker may be his closest friend, next
to the members of his immediate family.
Your female Capricorn employee follows the same path
as the male up that mountain. Nothing sways her from her
determination to seek a position of authority in the
firm or marry the boss. It doesn't matter a lot which it
is. As long as she comes out ahead. This woman won't
wear two sets of false eyelashes or jangling bracelets
to work and you'll never catch her spinning daydreams at
her desk. he lady goat is a Lady. She'll rarely raise
her voice or [ indulge in girlish gossip. There are more
important things on her mind than who is having an
affair with whom and what Emily said about Marilyn
getting back late from lunch. After office hours, she
may show a little more curiosity. The Saturn woman
sometimes lives vicariously on the details of other
people's romances, but she usually won't indulge herself
in discussing them on the boss's time. That's
logical enough. The boss may someday be her husband. In
all fairness, there's another reason. All goats S have a
serious sense of duty, a respect for their superiors, I
and an inner discipline which makes them abstain from
office monkeyshines.
Your Capricorn employees of either sex will be
businesslike. They disapprove of people who are late to
work, and who waste time in idle chitchat. They have no
patience with methods that aren't sound or procedures
that lack common sense, and they'll rearrange office
systems to make sure the organization runs with sensible
efficiency. Not all Capricorns are bankers, teachers and
bookkeepers. They also make excellent researchers,
extremely capable dentists, brilliant engineers and
architects, and they're clever at merchandising,
manufacturing and politics. Many goats are jewelers,
ministers, hotel managers, funeral directors, art
dealers or anthropologists, but whatever the occupation,
they'll be serious about it.
Don't forget that there's a creative side to Saturn
people. Your Capricorn employee may have a hobby that
could surprise you. He could be a Sunday artist, and a
very good one, too. He could be a weekend musician,
dabble in sculpture, sell real estate, apply his green
thumb to a garden, sing in a choir or belong to a drama
class. Culture is close to his heart. So is Mother
Earth. His real loves are his family, his home, his
work, money, prestige, books, art and music in just
about that order. Get an Aries, Leo, Gemini or
Sagittarius employee to travel for your firm. Most
Capricorns break out in a nervous rash at the sight of a
suitcase. Even if it's not quite that bad, they'll be
happier catching a commuter train than catching a jet.
Anyway, who would keep things nailed down while he's
away? Remember what happened when he took his vacation
last summer. Someone in the office went ahead and
ordered four dozen of those perfumed typewriter ribbons
in the rhinestone studded boxes.
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